Foster Failure

The term "foster failure" refers to a pet-foster who instead of helping the animal find their forever home, relents due to their love of the animal and adopts the pet themselves.  Personally, I'm not really that fond of the term. I think it may be right-on for some situations, where one has no intention of adding a new pet to their home, but just cannot bear the thought of letting the foster go, but when it comes to Junior Skiffle, he and I are all success!

I have fostered 14 animals in the last year and I loved each and every one. I was a bit more attached to a few of them compared to others, and the hardest to say goodbye to was, I think, the first.

I always asked myself  "Is this MY dog?" (or cat, in one case).  Molly & Rouni - the first pair - were some sort of shepherd mix, so I never had a doubt about the fact that they would grow too big for me. Lizzie, I must say, is ''the one that got away". Granted, it would've been harder as she is a pittie-mix (and would have been frowned upon at my old apartment), but man o' man was that a great dog; the best of the bunch I still believe! (cover your ears, JR!)  But in my heart of hearts, I didn't feel she was "MY" dog.

When I met Junior and his family, it took very little time for me to know that he was my dog. Each of his siblings was my favorite at one point or another, and his mother made a very tempting case for me to keep her. But there was something about Junior. I didn't pick him; I don't think necessarily that he picked me. It was just right -- like Texas. (Have you heard my story of how I found Austin? My bones knew I was home the moment I arrived.)

December '12
Notice the sweet up-turned nose!

But I'm now facing a new scenario that brings up the ugly term again: ¡foster failure!  One of my prior fosters, the last before The Greta Clan in fact, is now looking for a new home. I appreciate that the owners called me first, and they are not abandoning her recklessly, but they have decided that she is not a fit for their family. I find myself asking: Did I fail her, my little Biscuit? Did I send her home with the wrong people? Was I impatient or out of tune with my doggy-muses?  Perhaps I didn't socialize or train her enough to be the perfect pet for this family?  In reply, I am finding I can honestly look in the mirror and say "No. I did a great job fostering and placing her.
It just didn't work out."

If there is a part of me that wants to be mad at the adoptive owners, or mad at myself for sending her there,  that part isn't speaking very loudly.  My sister and her husband have 2 dogs that have not been trained or socialized to meet their full potential. But, you know what? They are also raising 5 truly stellar children. Who can judge that?! I have a good view of the juggling of many priorities and the immense love in the household, and those two pups are undeniably recipients of that love, even if they haven't been offered the best trainers or food or toys that money can buy. They are good dogs that bring happiness to the family, and it is a good and happy home for the dogs (as well as three cats).

Also, I recall some prior pets that didn't make the cut. The crazy banshee of a pup that tried eating the piano, for instance. She ended up on a great stretch of land with an owner that gave her a country-dog life. Could my sister and her family have predicted that the "dingo" (as they called her) wasn't a good fit?  Maybe. Perhaps? But, in the end, the dog is living a great dog's life, and the family gained a better understanding of the kind of pet that would fit their home and their lifestyle.

Sable Today

when Biscuit came home w/ me

So, Sable (once Biscuit) is looking for a new home. I hope to help as much as I am able. I'd love to see her and play with her while she's shopping for her new owners--even if she does pee when excited and doesn't quite have her puppy impulses under control.

I will sleep fine tonight knowing that I have not failed her as a foster, and ultimately, her current owners haven't failed her either. Together we are committed that she will never sleep in a shelter again, and we aren't looking for a low bid but rather we'll send her to the best home we can. And I trust -- as I've had to do each step of this foster journey -- that she will find her perfect home and that her new family will be overjoyed when they find this sweet girl.

Sable today (about 25 lbs)

The Grand Finale

So - I'm not sure that I'm really done with fostering. In fact I've tried a few times to 'take a break' and those lasted less than a week each. But I am feeling that this current assignment is something of a culmination of all the time and effort I've been putting in, and well... it sorta has me beat.

I have been longing for several months to bring home a momma dog and her pups. Something about the idea of watching the little creatures nursing, just tickled me silly. So when I saw the video of Greta with her 4 munchkins, I knew that this sweet terrier would be the perfect next foster gig for me!

She-- they-- haven't disappointed. When they came home with me the puppies were about 3 weeks old. Their eyes and ears had long opened, but they were nursing like little fiends. Mama was doing all the heavy lifting, eating for 5, and even cleaning up after the pups. (Tiny puppies and kittens need their mom's help to eliminate, which just works out as an added bonus if you're caring for such a family!)  The little boys (yup - 4 boys) looked as much like guinea pigs as dogs, and were pretty close to that size.

I set the family up in the bathroom, which I've long mastered on puppy-proofing, with a space to nest in the closet and wall-to-wall pee-pee pads. Feeding Greta 3-4 times a day, and taking her out about as often, was the bulk of the work.

It brought me immense joy to just go sit in there, pet the sweet mama - who lives for affection, while her babies sucked away, occasionally pushing each other out of the way to try a new teat, sometimes making sucking and grunting sounds, other times quietly engaged in their task until their eyelids started to droop in milked-out bliss.

This sweet arrangement was first disrupted by the poor mama doggy reminding me with no ambiguity that she was once a regular ol' dog, loved by some owner, before she was a mommy.  She started to demand to be released from the confines of the bathroom (who can blame her?!)  The little breaks and walks I offered were clearly not enough, and she wanted more freedom - and more couch time.

The inspiration for the next arrangement occurred when cleaning the bathroom. I had all the pups set up in the living room, in an enclosed pen, atop layers of plastic, blanket & towels, and then pee-pads.  It turns out the puppies had somehow managed to learn that the pads are where one 'goes', and the blankets are not. I was thrilled!   From here out, I have kept the brood in the living room. I was able to jimmy the opening to the pen so that Greta could jump in and out, but the puppies could not. Win-win-win: Mama could get away from them/ or get to them whenever she wanted. The puppies were still getting nursed and cleaned regularly. And I could watch all the fun from the comfort of my home-office on the couch.

And so all went swimmingly. Until Greta was done cleaning after the pups -- my job increased exponentially. And until the first pup learned how to climb out the gate -- I had to try to figure out when to get Mom in and out to meet both their needs and hers. And until she was ready to wean them.   And when they came into their full vocal glory of self-expression. And when they discovered how pleasurable it is to chew power cords, and.....

I now feel like I have two foster assignments: a grown dog, who barks at the neighbors and needs confidence building in addition to lots of belly rubs. And 4 puppies, who need a full-time maid. 

I'm not saying I regret it - not for one minute. But I am feeling that as sad as it will be to say good-bye come Monday, I am also ready.


Thing is... I think they are ready too!  Greta is definitely ready to be away from the din of these crazy monkeys. I think the puppies would even like breaks from each other. Sometimes the play gets a bit elevated, and they don't know how to calm themselves down. They do moderately well at removing themselves from the fracas when they need a break, but there is only so much room in their pen; and they've not yet earned more than limited part-time freedom in the living room.

I am a bit sad for them, as I imagine they will miss each other. But each one of them is going to an amazing home, and I know they will love all the extra time and attention. (Ha! Going from a household with 1 human and 5 dogs, to households with a minimum of 2 humans*see footnote --and in two cases they are going to have children as playmates -- will be a big and wonderful change indeed!)

Now for Miss Greta to just find her perfect forever home. Actually: first things first: she will be heading to another foster home after her spay surgery on Monday, so that she can receive treatment for heart-worm. A 3 month ordeal, her activity will be restricted, so really, she is the one I worry about the most.  I know, though, that she is going to good hands, and I trust -- as I always do (I must, to be able to foster) -- that she will find the absolute perfect forever home at just the right time.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
* One of the precious pups actually will remain in a one-person household. But if I may say so myself: he is getting a very doting, loving and excited owner, who fully intends to make him something of a 'circus dog'. Much more to come on that!

A new house-guest

Well - I finally feel like I'm a "real" dog foster!  I have brought home my first adult dog, Greta -- that is, my first adult foster, not counting the dog-sitting I've been doing (and LOVING!) Thing is, this girl is hardly your typical raised-on-the-streets stray (if there were such a thing). She is as sweet as can be, knows various commands, tolerates--nay, loves--excessive petting and cuddling and absolutely knows she belongs on the couch or a bed (and not locked in a bathroom and certainly not out in the elements on her own.)  Of all the animal house-guests I've had in the last year (if my count is right, that's 15), she is by far the best-mannered walking on a leash (and, yes, that includes Razzo, the cat that was so eager to get outside I harnessed him up--much to his pleasure!)


So, what kind of dog is she, you ask? She is some sort of terrier mix. The shelter is calling her a mini-Schnauzer. Makes sense given her adorable beard & eyebrows. But she doesn't have the correct height-to-length ratio. In other words, this girl is a long-rider (not so incredibly low... but she "should" be either taller or shorter from chest to tail.)  Her ears and color really don't point to her being a schnauzer, so I'm thinking some other type of terrier is in there. She has a good bit of the terrier personality too. Haven't seen her dig in the yard (yet) but I believe there is a doggy biscuit under my blankets and a vitamin treat under her doggy pillow. (Watching the burials was quite entertaining in fact.)  She is also happy to protect my house with her alert barks, and the birds and squirrels have inspired her ears to perk up just as a terrier's should.

In short, this is my kind of girl. When I dog-sat Gracie (the prison dog*) a few months back, I knew she was the kind of dog I would love to "own". [I'll save my thesis on the concept of 'owning' pets for another time.] Greta really is bringing forward much of the same characteristics that turned me on then. 

Suffice it to say, this is about the easiest dog-foster assignment anyone could have ever.

Oh wait.... it would be, if Greta weren't the nursing momma of 4 gorgeous pups!!

I know, I know... you just want to hear about the puppies (assuming you want to read any of this; maybe you just want puppy pictures!) But, I am so enamored with this dog that I feel she deserves her own complete report-out. Greta has been quick to inform me that she was a regular dog before she was a mommy, and clearly she was a well behaved house-dog, perhaps even well-loved before she was a stray. So, it is my intention to give her her due respects -- starting with lots of belly rubs, and even letting her sit on the couch with me as I type tonight.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

*Gracie was busted out of doggie jail to go have a stay at a real jail as part of an amazing program where the inmates train dogs that would otherwise be on the 'PTS' list. <yes - think the worst for a shelter dog>. Gracie was rambunctious enough to be 'at risk' -- girl had street smarts-- but was taken into this program (Paws in Prison) where she learned good doggy manners and from which her now-owners adopted her. With no disrespect to all the other doggies I completely love, Gracie was my favorite... or rather: the most like I imagine my ideal dog to be: high-energy, curly-haired, self-determined, and with an unmistakeable joy for life!

Home Alone

"My dog can't be left alone. He needs a doggy door or another dog to be with. When my aunt left him in her house while she went to a meeting, he ate the baseboard around the front door."

"My 7-week old puppy doesn't like being left alone. Would you be able to be with my pup at all times?"


Hmmm...... Really?!  How do you think your dog got to be that way? Really?! A 7-week puppy doesn't like to be alone?  Have you ever heard of weaning? What do you want to bet that one of these owners will be writing the other message in a year or few years from now?

These are two inquiries I've received recently on DogVacay -- the website I use to make my home available for doggy house-guests for other owners.  I am eagerly learning more and more about dog behavior, puppy-rearing, training, and so on, so I need to remember that most people don't work so hard to understand dogs as I am doing. But I just marvel at the extent people will go to "care" for their dogs, and yet the lack of consideration to training or behavior modification.

Maybe it just seems obvious to me that puppies don't like being left alone. And that it's a learned skill that we can help them develop. This, really, I knew by the age of 10 or whenever we first brought home a puppy. (I always remember the travel alarm-clock we put in there with the pups to help them feel they weren't alone.)

Thing is, if you're going to have a dog in your home, you will want to help them become a part of the family, and that includes learning how to successfully navigate the rhythms of the household - including being left alone. I'm not saying you should just lock them up and go on your merry way -- but crate training is beloved by handlers and trainers, and things like kongs* were created for a reason!   Ensuring that your puppy is coddled 24/7 is just not a workable answer (at least not for most of us). Please consult a trainer. There are loads of resources out there, and if your dog is suffering undue stress (and your home unnecessary damage!), how about start teaching your puppy that being alone is perfectly fine and can even have rewards. Or start teaching your older dog to feel more confident when alone. It may take some work and dedication -- but isn't it worth it?



*Kong is the band-name for a durable rubber chew toy with a cavity that can be stuffed with treats, which can keep dogs entertained for several minutes up to a few hours.

On potty training

I am certainly no expert, but I have been lucky to have seven puppies come stay with me over the last nine months, so I have, by necessity, learned a thing or two about potty training.  I was touched recently to receive my first plea for help!

One of my friends has just adopted two chiweenie puppies now 10-weeks old, and wrote to ask: 

I am struggling with paper training. I have papers for them and direct them to the papers at times they should need to potty and lovingly hold them there for a minute or so and then let them go and they walk off the paper and pee! 

When I am gone I have been putting them in the bath tub and they use the paper in the tub. I recently switched them to a larger space and they used the paper as well.  It is just that when they are not confined they don't use the paper. I know they are young so I have not pushed anything. What do you think? I would love your tips of the trade.

Here are a few thoughts I shared with her:

Note that smaller breed dogs take longer to house-train. This doesn't actually help you, I know, but just so you know it's not just you if they don't get it right away! Be sure to have lots of patience with the little guys.

The main training suggestion I have heard & will share is: lavish praise and reward when they go where you want them to. In general with training, the reinforcement has to happen within about 3-5 seconds of a behavior for them to make an association, but if you can have some treats on the ready, and throw a big Happy Party every time you catch them peeing on the pads, even if you're a little "late" they will start to learn that good things happen when they go there. The timing is hard, granted. If you start the praise too soon, they may get distracted & stop their good deed !   (I would do this any time they do either #1 or #2 in the right place, and you are able to catch them at it.)

There are still people who advocate nose-rubbing if they go where they shouldn't -- again, pretty much right at the time of the act-- (I have a dog-sitter that I otherwise love, that insists on it), but I am not going that route myself.  For one thing, you don't want them to think that going in front of you is bad. (They will likely make the association of the punishment with you, rather than with the location.)

Another thing on that note, often puppies will pee once, but not really be quite done. So, be aware that after they've gone, they may still need to go again in a few minutes.

Do you have an outside space that you want them to go? Or are you, perhaps waiting until their immune systems are stronger?
I haven't spent as much focus on pee-pads w/ my pups, but rather have focused on outdoor training.   I put them down on the lawn, and ignore them (rather than play) until they've gone. After potty-time is play time.
(I have actually been amazed at how the puppies figure out the pee pads w/out my influence -- for 'their' room, anyway. Whatever they put in those things must help.)

I have to wonder if your restraining them is discouraging for going. I mean I'm sure it's no harm... but they probably prefer to go when they have their little bit of freedom.  The other thing about the more confined spaces: it is natural for pups to not want to have their waste where they sleep, eat or play. So it sounds like they are making those differentiations in their 'bedroom'. But your living room... is like a great big world for them!   If I have a puppy loose in the living room (or a section of it), I will put down a pad or two, and put them on it frequently. I've found that even if the puppy knows it's there and has gone on it, they will sometimes pee just a few feet away. I think they are too busy playing, and just stop & drop -- and don't have the foresight to walk a few feet before they go!  (I have the cheapest carpet in the world, and I steam-clean it frequently... so I know it really doesn't bug me as much as it would others. ;)

So, one other idea is to keep their free spaces pretty small. And to place down a couple pads; i.e. cover more space. I have a puppy with me for the last 4 days or so; last night I fenced her in a space in the living room about 2 ft x 4ft (She is very little & quite young). 1/2 the space was covered in a towel & another 1/4 w/ a pad. She peed with her front feet on the pad, and her back feet (and the pee) off!  Ugh... Nice try at least! :D

Also - watch for the indications that they are needing to go. They will sometimes start sniffing the ground, walking in little circles, maybe heading toward a wall or other object, and for #2, some pups will start doing funny things like taking little steps backwards. If you see any of these, pick 'em up and place the puppy on the pads.

Here's one other thing I discovered that has saved me tons of energy!  "Construction Paper". Not the stuff for art class, but what you find at Home Depot or Lowe's; it's what they would use to cover a work area. You can get a big roll for about $10-12.  Your little ones may not need it for their bedroom space as it sounds like they are coming along well.  But I use it to cover my bathroom (i.e. the puppy room) wall-to-wall, and I use some blue painters tape to secure it. If there are accidents and food spills it all ends up on the paper. ("If"!  Ha ha ha!  There are always accidents & spills!)  Depending on the puppy & the mess, I need to pull it up & re-paper every few days or 1x/ week, but man, that has been so much easier than mopping every day or twice a day!  You might see if it works for covering other areas of the house when they are out & about.


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

So, that's what I know off-hand about potty training. What have you found that works? Any other suggestions?

Books on handling/ dog behavior

Books recommended by Paws In Prison  

• Good Owners, Great Dogs by Brian Kilcommons and Sarah Wilson

• How to be the Leader of the Pack...And have Your Dog Love You For It. by Patricia B. McConnell

• Dog Logic : Companion Obedience, Rapport-Based Training by Joel M. McMains

• The Dog's Mind: Understanding Your Dog's Behavior by Bruce Fogle and Anne B. Wilson

• Feeling Outnumbered? How to Manage and Enjoy Your Multi-Dog Household by Karen B. London, Patricia B. McConnell

• Genetics and the Social Behavior of the Dog by John Paul Scott, John L. Fuller

• The New Knowledge of Dog Behavior by Clarence Pfaffenberger

• The Social Lives of Dogs: The Grace of Canine Company by Elizabeth Marshall Thomas